A new study finds that you can determine how sexist a man is-whether the more hostile and malignant form, or the more benign and patronizing model-by how he smiles towards women, and how he speaks to them, during social interactions. The team describes so-called benevolent sexism, which may appear less negative on the surface, as more paternalistic, reflecting a "chivalrous and subjectively positive view of women." Men who demonstrate this "well-intentioned" sexism see women as warm and pure yet helpless, incompetent, and in need of protection. This is something most women have experienced, as the kind of sexism many term "mansplaining."
To give every gentleman (gentle ==> decent here to filter out creeps) I have ever interacted with a benefit of doubt, I am going to confess I have rather tiny form, very big eyes & massive cheeks that all together give me very childlike appearance, even now in my late 30s. So most gentlemen usually react with subconscious urge to protect me, which I understand if not approve. What stumps me is that they take rather extreme view of hating my guts if I ever challenge their views; instead of taking me as a worthy adversary or even highly opinionated friend; they try very hard to patronize, sometimes even trying to question my right to my opinions as an adult or women too...Recently, I had very interesting conversation with my long time (more than 2 decades) friend from school let's call him A. A is a good friend; someone I would not hesitate to call up for help even at midnight. A is also a very successful news editor hence politics & political coverage come with the domain. I on the contrary am a very much "once in a week news reader". But I am very much interested in gossip about one particular older than middle-aged politician (aged > 50) who claims he is representing younger generation & calls women 5 yrs. younger than him Auntie. In what universe is 50 young, even after stretching the average life-expectancy of 80yrs to 100yrs.
Believe me every time I see/hear this politician speak, I am filled with gratitude that Mata Sarasvati gave me intelligence as well as wisdom. Sometimes though, the hubris of being so blessed does get better of me, & I give in to the impulse of forwarding some of the not so flattering information about this person albeit very comic ones. So, as I put up a meme on my WhatsApp status, about this man's hypocrisy, I got a ping from my friend A, who at first very politely tried convincing me that how I have no idea about what this person stands for, that he & his political party is only saviour for women in India. He highlighted that this is also the only political party that put up the one and only Woman Prime-minister of India, so on & on.....
It was Sunday morning, I was having breakfast with coffee, unusually rare but I had some time on my hand, so I decided to challenge his views, hence put forth following arguments:
· He pointed out that the party chair is woman, to which I countered from the same family. As matter of fact all of the prime-ministers' & prime-ministerial candidates' except one from this political party have come from one single family, is this not the very definition of Nepotism?
· His summing argument after which he has been ghosting me, very emphatically delivered "how I have no idea what problems women face in India",
seriously bro ? is this not the very exact definition of mansplaining?
